Last week, when the poster advertising the wedding of an Isoko man and two women surfaced on social media, some people considered it a joke, or rather, another scene from a Nollywood movie.
But it turned out to be true because the event slated for Sunday, March 26, in Delta State, saw the man simply identified as Emamuzo get married to two women – Janet and Osioni.
The wedding photos were shared by witnesses who attended the occasion, and they have triggered a conversation on social media, with many people questioning the rationale behind marrying two wives on the same day. While some Nigerians have criticised the idea of a man getting married to two women on the same day even though he hasn’t broken any customary law, others have branded him an ‘MVP’.
In a society like ours where patriarchy has long been enthroned, Emamuzo was hailed for finding the women ‘worthy’, and this is because marriage is mostly viewed in our clime as an obligation; the man rescues the women and they go on to produce children that carry on the man’s legacy.
Women too, tenaciously justify getting married (and under worrying terms, too, like the above) because of religious and cultural conditioning that makes a woman enter into a union believing she is fulfilling her obligations on earth, that she is nothing without a man giving her his surname. And so, not to offend the various expectations hefted on her shoulders, she goes on to marry, and under any conditions, she does her family proud.
Her perceived acceptance is viewed as willful participation in the setup that benefits mostly the man; he owns her and their children. However, her rebellion is not easily forgiven.
A single/divorced mother continues to sit at the bottom rung of the ladder in our society. She would be better valued if she were a widow.
But the continuous conversation around the marriage institution and- yes!- feminism has given some women voice. More women are now walking away from violent/uncomfortable relationships. More women are realising that they can achieve a greater purpose happily by making better choices, by not considering themselves burdens. More women too are also viewing some relationships as transactional – the man walks into union with plans set for himself, and they too, the women, map out plans that would be beneficial for them too.
So, is marrying two women on the same day a good thing? Here’s what some folks think of this setup: